Dolphin Tales

No, not that "Morgan Freeman trying to save a paraplegic dolphin"- dolphin tales, this is about something totally different. Seems with enough time and money you can have these guys build you a dolphin shaped boat/submarine type thing. Sounds weird, looks cool. This is exactly why I need a sugar mama, so she can buy me cool stuff like this!

The Online Gamer

Here's a clip I was showed in one of my classes recently that I thought was funny enough to share. Ever heard of or even seen those kids role playing in medieval clothes in the park that obviously don't care about life? Well here's if you added someone obsessed with Call of Duty. Enjoy.

Angry Birds

Angry Birds is a game designed for smart phones like iphones and Androids. But let me warn you, this shit is the fucking devil. It's super addictive, easy to learn, hard to master, and very entertaining. The whole point of the game is to use a slingshot to shoot a limited number of these (angry) birds at the pigs who have stolen their eggs. The pigs have taken shelter behind wood, glass, and stones set up in a variety of ways. Sounds simple right? Well different colored birds have different special abilities. Using their abilities have to kill the pigs while scoring as many points as possible while also using as few birds as possible. This thing is a great time waster. Trust me, you'll be hitting the reset button quite a few times. Head to your phones app store and pick up the game if you've got nothing better to do.

We're Back

We fell off for a bit, but we're working on bringing some more posts to this thing. You know, just in case somebody is actually reading this thing haha. Now how about a quick laugh?

Things Everybody Hates

Thought I'd make a list of things nobody likes. If you do like something on this list you're probably the type of person who finds dogs and children attractive. Fucking Sicko.

1. Drying off with wet towels
2. Black jelly beans and licorice
3. Finding other people's hair on you
4. Finding out you didn't have to be somewhere for another hr
5. That one person on Facebook who keeps trying to add you
6. Fat girls in clothes that are too small

Charlie Sheen: Great Guy? Or Greatest Guy?

Ok, everybody knows about Charlie Sheen and how batshit crazy awesome the guy is, but I actually have a problem with how CBS is treating him. The man showed up to work, hit his lines, did well and was never a problem aside from missing practice (anybody else catch that AI reference from him?!). My point is, he should not have been fired, suspended, or whatever you want to call it. If his personal life isn't affecting his work life in a negative manner then CBS shouldn't have the right o pull the plug on the show. I for one would be pissed if my job fired me because they thought I partied to hard. It's none of their business. What do you think?

End Of Days?

Lately there's been news of birds falling out of the sky, fishes drowning, and I just read something about cows falling over dead (Ground Beef!). It's clear what's happening. The Apocalypse, Ragnarok, The Second Coming of Jesus. Call it what you will, but its obvious that those Mayans were on to something when they figured out shit was hitting the fan in 2012. But don't fret! Here's a list of things to make your last few months on Earth a blast!

1.Cocaine.
Now, I've never personally used cocaine, but from what I've heard, it's some pretty great stuff! Imagine spending your last precious moments tweeked outta your mind. Sounds nice, right?

2.Sex With Fat Chicks
Cuz they need love too.

3.Hunting
Get a move on! Animals are dropping dead left and right, hell by the time you're done reading, they could all be gone.

4.Disney Cruise
Sounds weird I know, but imagine being jacked up off coke, banging a fat chick, and hunting mickey all while enjoying the amenities that can only be found on a luxury cruise liner. Exactly.

Thank me in the after-life